


Feral

by RoyaiFan101



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: A different take on how I usually portray a younger Riza, F/M, Miscarriage, Royai!AU, Young!Royai, its in Ch 3 for those that wanna skip it, no he doesn’t molest her- I’ll never write a story about him doing THAT, probably the worst way I’ll ever write Berthold is in this story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-03
Updated: 2020-09-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:02:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,047
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26273059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoyaiFan101/pseuds/RoyaiFan101
Summary: The people of her town call her feral, a possessed little hell spawn. But Riza doesn’t care. Not enough to change, at least.
Relationships: Riza Hawkeye/Roy Mustang
Comments: 6
Kudos: 35





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNINGS for this chapter:  
> •consensual sex between a fourteen year old girl and a seventeen-almost eighteen year old boy.  
> •brief mentions of sexual assault/non-con towards a minor (it’s not threatened, just mentioned)  
> I love how the fandom (at least over on Tumblr) head canon Young!Royai as either Riza being this shy little abused, neglected, & bullied wallflower that Roy tries to get out of her shell or Riza being this absolute feral hell child that city boy Roy is absolutely terrified of because she probably has rabies and I don’t know which one I love more.
> 
> So here is my take on Feral!Riza, because I’ve written Wallflower!Riza multiple times in the past.

The Mothers of her classmates call her a _demon_ child. Wild and feral and possibly rabid. _Stay away from that girl, sweetie. You don’t want to befriend someone like that._

She doesn’t mind, nor does she wonder why. Riza isn’t stupid; _she knows why_. She’s not a delicate little girl in lacy flowery dresses with her hair long and in braids. Never has been, most likely never will be. She wears torm up shorts, old sneakers, and ratty tops when it’s hot outside, and old sweaters with ripped up jeans when it’s cold out. Her hair is cut short and choppy at the base of her neck and the longest it’s ever been in her entire life is just an inch or two below her earlobes.

 _Anyone_ that suggests she wear a skirt or grows her hair out gets a rough, well aimed kick to the shins.

Riza Hawkeye ( _what the hell kind of name is Riza anyway? Why would they name her Elizabeth Verniece just to call her Riza in the end? How do you get Riza from either of those names? That’s like naming your son Geoffrey Adam and calling him Bob!_ ) is the girl with the Mother who left when she was three because she decided one day that she didn’t want to be a wife or a mother anymore, and the Father who forgets he’s even a father nine times out of ten because he cares too much about his Alchemic research.

Alchemy? Bleh! She _hates_ it. Hates it more then her deadbeat Mother and her classmates with their own prissy parents. It’s why she’s spent the last ten and a half years of her life raising herself. It’s why she’ll spend the rest of her childhood raising herself.

She’s fourteen years old and has no friends. Frankly isn’t sure if she even wants them. Everyone talks about her behind her back, not even trying to hide the fact that they’re doing so. And if they’re not talking about _her_ , then they’re shit talking _Pauline and Berthold Hawkeye_. The parents who _forgot_ that they were parents.

Riza doesn’t spend her free time sipping on tea or gardening or learning a random ass useless instrument or knitting like her female classmates do. She’s the girl that gets into fights with the boys, not always winning but making sure her opponents are just as bloodied and bruised as they leave her.

If she had been blessed- or _cursed_ , which ever term you prefer to use- parents that cared, she’d have been sent off to a rehorm school years ago.

It’s _normal_ for her to come home from school with bruises on her knuckles, cuts on her arms and scrapes on her knees, and spots of blood coming from _somewhere_ on her face- usually her bottom lip but sometimes her nose. On the rare days that she doesn’t, her neighbors that see her walking home think she skipped school entirely.

Every time she comes home, she wonders about the string of apprentices that come and go to try to learn Alchemy from her father. A constant line of boys ranging from her age to several years older desperate to be the next great Alchemist. _Ha_! What a bunch of losers.

Current loser? City slicker Roy Mustang.

He’s a few years older then her, two or three- maybe even four if she cared enough to remember what he said when he told her is age when he first showed up at her decrepit childhood home two years ago- and does not do a good job at hiding the fact that he is, without a doubt, scared shit less of her.

Not only that, but he’s an idiot. A klutz. Constantly injuring himself one way or another with one Alchemy related oops or another. She uses the crappy first aid kit under the kitchen sink on him just as much as she uses it on herself. Mr. Mustang, _loser extraordinaire_ , is going to end up returning to Central in a _body bag_ and or in _pieces_ if he doesn’t start being more careful.

Riza will admit one thing about him though. _He is cute_. Much cuter then the other boys in town. Riza isn’t the only young girl to drool over him, she’s just the only one that doesn’t make it so damn obvious.

Roy might be the _second_ biggest dumb ass to ever step foot into Hawkeye Manor- no one will ever top _Jacen Mars_ , who didn’t even last a full twelve hours of being her Father’s apprentice before being sent home back to North City- but he’s still cute, nonetheless.

She wonders what would happen if he came across her swimming _naked_ in the pond at the end of her Father’s property.

Riza has seen Roy Mustang naked. And Roy looks very nice when he’s naked. Despite how unladylike she acts on a daily basis, she doesn’t sleep around. She’s only ever kissed a handful of boys, never anything beyond kissing, and the last time that happened was six months before Roy even showed up at her house.

She’s seen other boys naked before, those even bigger idiots running around town streaking, screaming and hollering as they make the elderly ladies gasp and cover their eyes, as they’re being chased by Sheriff Rodney or Old Man Cramer who runs the General Store. They’re always pale and... squishy looking. Roy _is_ pale, but he doesn’t appear to be squishy. She’s convinced that the only squishy parts about him are his cheeks.

Both sets.

The other girls her age would probably hate her even more then they already do if they found out she accidentally saw him naked because he doesn’t know how to lock a door when he’s getting dressed.

Or they would accuse her of having sex with him and call her a slut because she didn’t wait until marriage like “ _good girls_ ” are supposed to do.

But who knows? Riza doesn’t, and she most definitely doesn’t care.

She probably would sleep with him, if he said he wanted to. How easily Riza Hawkeye would drop her shorts and underwear, lay on her back, and spread her legs open for Roy Mustang if he asked her nicely utterly scares her.

But _only_ for _him_. Never for the other boys in town. They’ll have to hold her down and force her thighs apart in order to get inside of her. They'll have to cut out her tongue to get her to be quiet.

She wonders what would happen if she pushed him up against a tree or a wall and sunk to her knees.

She saw it happen once. Lily Peters, who was two years older then Riza and one of their town’s shining stars when it came to how a young lady _should_ act, was on her knees in front of Cody Emmet in a back alley about a year ago. Cody’s pants were around his ankles and his head was thrown back while he moaned, his fingers twisted in Lily’s long brown hair.

Riza doubts she could get Roy to moan like that, at least not on the first try. But hey, practice makes perfect.

“Miss Riza! What are you doing?”

Riza looks up from where she’s swimming, _yes naked_ , in the pond. Roy is standing at the shore, eyes wide and jaw hung open. She rolls her brown eyes at the adorable idiot.

“Swimming.” She tells him.

“ _Naked_?”

“Yep.” She clicks her tongue, swimming backwards as she keeps her breasts and everything below them under the surface of the jade green water. She only wants him to see her naked if it’s what _he_ wants.

“What if someone was to show up and tries to rape you?” He asks, sitting down on the sand.

“I don’t need clothes on to kick someone’s ass, Roy!” She yells back. “But I appreciate your concern for my safety.” She adds.

“Wanna join me?” Riza suggests, cocking an eyebrow up.

Roy stares at her like she’s sprung an extra head. _This girl is twelve different flavors of bat shit crazy!_

“It’s not like I haven’t seen you naked before.” She points out.

“That was one time!” Roy yelps. “And I’m probably the only guy you’ve ever seen naked before!” He cried, pointing an accusatory finger at her.

“Nope. You’re not the first guy I’ve seen naked. You’re the first guy I’ve ever seen naked that didn’t make me want to lose my lunch, though.” Riza shrugs.

“Is that a compliment? Because I feel like that that shouldn’t be a compliment.”

_Of course it’s a compliment, you dum bass._

“Either get in the water or get lost, Mustang.” Riza snapped at him, sucking in a breath before diving below the surface, giving him privacy to make a decision. The water in her ears muffles the sounds of him splashing into the pond.

She resurfaces, both to get air and look for him, and spots him about halfway between her and the edge where the sand ends and the water begins.

“You’re dad will kill me if he finds out we’re skinny dipping together.” Roy tells her, and she lifts up her eyebrow in confusion.

“Skinny dipping...?” She asks, and tries not to laugh at the shade of _red_ his entire face turns.

“I-it’s w-when you s-swim while y-you’re n-naked.” He stammers. _How does she not know what skinny dipping is!?_

“ _Oh_. Never realized there was a _name_ for it.” She shrugs, leaning backwards to float on her back. _To hell with it, let him look if he wants to or cover his eyes up if he doesn’t._

“And don’t kid yourself, Roy. In order for my dad to kill you he would have to care about me.” Riza scoffs.

“He does care about you.” He tells her, and the look on his face tells Riza that he agrees with her.

“Oh get real, Mustang. I could decide one day not to go home after school, and it would taken him _days_ \- maybe even _weeks_ \- before he noticed that I was gone.”

“It took him nearly a _month_ to notice that my mom had _left us_ , and he loved her way more then he loves me.” She adds solemnly.

 _How ironic is it that the parent that abandoned me is the one that wanted me to exist in the first place?_ Riza wonders if it took Pauline three years to realize that she never really wanted kids, or if she and a new husband have had a handful of Riza replacements in the decade that she’s been gone.

What kind of a Mother leaves her toddler behind, just to pop out new children to replace them?

“I’m sorry.” Roy mumbles softly.

“Eh.” Riza shrugs. “Don’t be. You don’t see me crying over my _deadbeat egg donor_ , now do you?”

They’re silent for awhile after she says this, the only sounds being the splash of the water as they swam around the pond, swimming close enough to each other that someone passing by could tell they were companions, but not close enough to touch each other.

“Hey Roy? Can I ask you something?” Riza asks, breaking the silence.

“Hmm? Sure. Whatcha wanna ask?”

“Have you ever had sex before?”

It’s an odd sensation, feeling your heart drop down to your ass. It’s something a seventeen year old Roy never thought he would experience, most definetly not at the words of a fourteen year old girl.

It’s the second time today that Riza has seen Roy’s face turn a deep shade of blood red.

“Well...?” She asks, cocking her head to the side.

“N-no.” He stutters.

“Cool. Neither have I. Most people think I _have_ , though. Probably because I’m unladylike and constantly getting into fights with other people. Most of the town thinks I’m an unruly hell spawn, they might as well think I spread my legs, too.” Riza tells him nonchalantly, like it’s the simplest subject in the entire world.

“People around town shouldn’t talk crap about you. Especially the _adults_.” He says.

“It doesn’t bother me. I’m used to it now. It’s no different then the weather.” It sucks that she’s being truthful. But that’s her life, and these are the cards that she’s been dealt.

She bites her bottom lip as she feels heat pool between her thighs.

“Do you w-want to?” Roy asks.

“Want to what?” She asks, raising an eyebrow. Riza is utterly hoping that he means having sex. She wants to have sex with him, that’s why she brought it up.

“Have sex.” Roy tells her. “With me.” He adds for clarity.

_Holy shit, it’s Christmas. Today has to be Christmas. Or my birthday. Hell, maybe even both. A combination of the two._

“Yes.” She tells him simply, and the next thing she knows, they’re getting out of the pond and she’s laying down on the sand, Roy nestled between her open legs.

He leaves kisses along her chest, trailing down past her stomach to the small thatch if blonde curls below her naval. Riza opens her mouth and moans when his hands grip her thighs and spreads her open even farther, his mouth pressed against her opening. He groans against her lips as her fingers clutch his hair, his hand snaking up to grasp her breast. Her mind is utterly blown right now. She’s never heard of this being done before. Though in the scheme of things it does make sense to her.

If Lily can drop to her knees, why can’t Cody?

“Roy, oh g-god.” She groans, arching her back as one of his fingers slips inside of her, going deeper then her own fingers have ever gone before. She feels her walls clench around his fingers, an experience she’s made herself with familiar on occasion.

He sits up before repositioning himself between her legs, his member hard against her inner thigh. She glances down between them and _oh dear god it just moved._

“Do you still want to do this?” Roy asks softly. Giving her an out. If they get caught, Berthold _will_ kill them _both_ , despite Riza’s beliefs that he doesn’t give a shit. Riza nods, wrapping her legs around him as best as she can without hurting either of them. He swallows harshly, grips the base of his cock and sinks fully inside of her at a pace that’s agonizingly slow.

The sensation _burns_ , but she doesn’t want it to stop. Not as he leans over her, buries his face against her and picks up speed, grunting and groaning every time he sheaths himself inside of her. Her arms wrap around his back as she bites at his shoulder to keep her moans down.

It isn’t long before she feels her walls clench again, this time around his dick instead of his finger.

“Oh _f-fuck_.” He gasps against her throat, his body tensing up.

It's not long after that that she feels him twitching deep inside of her, a warmth she doesn’t understand yet doesn’t care enough to ask about flooding inside of her.

Roy sits up and slowly pulls out of her, and Riza lifts her head up again from the sand just in time to see a bit of milky colored liquid oozing out of the tip of his member that’s streaked with her blood. He grabs his boxers from behind him, and uses them to clean up her inner thighs, before he gives Riza her clothes so they can get dressed.

Once they’re dressed and walking back, Riza worries he regrets it: losing his virginity to his Master’s fourteen year old feral daughter. But if he does, he doesn’t act like it. Not when he grabs her hand to hold it during the walk back, only letting go once they see the manor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly like the idea of Riza’s mother abandoning her instead up simply dying. It’s a nice change to what me and 98% of the authors who haven’t written about Riza and her childhood have come up with.
> 
> Elizabeth Verniece is actually after my Paternal Grandmother, it was not a name that I randomly came up with.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNINGS for this chapter:  
> •More sex between a fourteen year old girl & a seventeen year old boy  
> •A scene that can be considered questionable when it comes to consent, but ultimately is consensual.
> 
> (All sex scenes are consensual, however not in a legal standing)

They have sex, _again_ , two nights later.

Roy is silent as he enters her bedroom, locking the door behind him. Riza glances over at him and puts the book she was reading down on her nightstand, pulling her nightgown (the closest thing to a dress that she will _ever_ willingly wear anytime soon) up and over her head and tossing it on to the floor, clicking her lamp off as Roy climbed underneath her sheets, nestling his body between her legs. He presses their lips together and it’s only then that she realizes that this is the first time they’ve ever kissed each other, as his hand snakes down to remove her underwear.

Only to discover that she _isn’t_ wearing _any_.

“Naughty girl.” He teases against her lips. “Did you know I was going to come see you tonight?” He asks her between kisses.

“ _I never sleep with panties on_.” She whispers into his ear, a smirk on his face.

It’s a lie. She always slept with underwear on, only stopping the night before last. But she isn’t about to tell him the truth. Let Roy think whatever the hell he wants to about her. Everyone else in town does. He might as well, too.

He uses his fingers to get her off, opening her up for him. Their lips stay together to get each other quiet to keep quiet, and she tenses up and bucks her hips when she cums. Roy quickly removes his pajama pants and boxers, gripping his dick before pushing inside of her.

His thrusts are forced to be slow and shallow, due to the fear of the mattress squeaking and waking Berthold up. And both of them know that the other really isn’t the sex like they did the first time.

Roy is in her for about a minute before he sits up and pulls out of her completely. Riza lets out a whimper, worried. _Was it so bad that he would rather go back to his room and get himself off?_

She’s surprised when he stands up, scoops her into his arms and lays her down on the floor on their clothes between her bed and the window. Roy is back inside of her before she can even say a word. The solid surface of the floor allows him to pound into her, their lips locked while they moaned, Riza’s limbs wrapped around his torso.

“God damn baby, you feel so good around my cock.” He grunted against her lips, one of his hands gripping her hip while the other rubs her clit.

“Oh fuck. Please don’t stop. Roy, don’t stop.” She gasps, fingers clutching his hair as her back arches.

She feels herself cumming, her walls tightening around him. Roy is able to slam into her a handful of times before she feels him emptying in to her. He collapses on top of her, the two of them panting against the others necks, Roy still buried deep inside of her. Riza kisses his neck as her hands rub his back, humming with satisfaction.

She would’ve had sex months ago like everyone thought she was if she knew it felt _this great._

“How are you feeling?” She asks softly.

“Fine. You?”

“Great.” Riza cooes, kissing the side of his temple. He sits up and peppers kisses along her face, a smile on both of their faces while he did so.

“What do you wanna do with your life, besides Alchemy?” Riza asks him.

“I wanna enlist. Join the military. Become a State Alchemist. Try and make some part of the world better.” He said, like it was the simplest thing in the world.

“Don’t tell my Dad about your plans. _That_ will piss him off more then _this_ will.” Riza informs him, waving her hand at their conjoined bodies.

It’s sad because what she said is true.

“You might wanna get dressed and head back to your room.” Riza reminded him. Roy frowns and nods, knowing she’s correct. He sits up and pulls out of her, once again grabbing his boxers to clean his seed from her thighs. It’s a lot easier to explain a semen stain on _his_ clothes then it would on _her_ clothes.

“Goodnight, Riza.” He whispers in her ear, once she’s redressed and back under her sheets.

“Goodnight, Roy.” She smiles at him, biting her bottom lip as he sneaks out of her room.

* * *

Their nightly activities are repeated every night for two weeks. They have a routine down to a t.

After midnight Roy sneaks into her room, where Riza is bare and under the covers waiting for him to claim her. He removes his pants, they lay on the floor and he’s in and out of her and back to his own bedroom within half an hour, the only evidence of their little tryst being the bits of his seed that doesn’t spill out of her and onto her thighs.

Riza isn’t really sure what to call the place between her legs. She isn’t much of a fan of the more dainty terms her teachers call it; _womanhood_ and _flower_. But she’s also not a fan of the more vulgar terms that the teen boys refer to it as; _pussy_ and _cunt_.

Maybe there’s a term that meets in the middle that Roy knows of that doesn’t make Riza cringe?

They try out different positions as well. Riza isn’t sure which position she likes more; the one where Roy is on his back and she’s riding him like a stallion (he did _not_ enjoy the joke she made about that position and his last name) or the one where’s she’s on her hands and knees and he’s taking her from behind.

It’s harder to her to stay completely silent with the latter. It’s a bit painful, the tip of Roy’s dick occasionally hitting a spot deep inside of her that has her whimpering. The first time it happened, he had pulled back in concern.

_“Are you okay?” He had whispered softly into her ear._

_“Y-yeah. That just hurt a bit.” She told him._

_“Do you want to change positions?”_

_“No. It felt good.” Riza gasped._

* * *

Riza is leaving school one day when she sees Roy leaning against a tree, waiting for her. Despite hating ninety nine percent of her home town and its inhabitants, she loves going to school. She loves to learn, and she loves her teacher, Miss Austin.

Riza is one of the best in her class, regardless of her wild outbursts. According to Miss Austin, Riza is one of the few students at the school that has the genuine chance of going on to university.

“What are you doing? Shouldn’t you be studying?” She asks in disbelief.

“Your Dad went to West City. Said he’d be back in a week. Figured I would walk you home.” Roy shrugged.

“Well aren’t you sweet.” Riza smirked, as they walked home side-by-side.

As soon as they’re through the front door, he presses her against the wall, his mouth on her neck. He grips her thighs and hikes her up, wrapping her legs around his waist.

“R-Roy. N-no.” She groaned, gripping his hair to pull him away from her neck.

“C’mon baby, please.” He begged, his hand slipping under her shirt.

“I said _no_!” She snapped, smacking him upside the head. He pulls away from her neck, looking her in the eyes. Riza tries not to freeze up. She doesn’t know what he’s going to do next. She’s never told Roy no before when it came to sex. They’ve had sex every day for nearly three weeks now, and Riza doesn’t know if either of them are capable of not screwing each other the first chance they got.

 _“I’m sorry_.” He mumbles, kissing her cheek.

“It’s okay. But I’ve got homework to do, and you have to study.” She reminds him, kissing him on the lips. “Besides, look on the bright side.”

“What’s that?”

“You don’t have to sneak in and out of my room tonight.” Riza tells him, smirking as she jumps down and carries her school bag to the kitchen.

* * *

It’s an odd sensation, being able to have sex in her bed, not having to worry about being quiet.

Post coital snuggles are also a new experience. Roy finds he enjoys the feeling of Riza’s head laying against his chest as he traces patterns along the naked skin of her back. Neither say a word, they don’t have to. Pillow talk isn’t necessary. The both of them are content with their arms wrapped around the other.

It’s a strange sensation for Riza. Roy is one of the only people in eleven years to give her any sort of kind human touch. Miss Austin occasionally gives her a pat on the shoulder, and she gave Riza a hug when she found her crying once five years ago. But that’s it. Meanwhile Roy helps her with her chemistry homework when she needs it and is too scared to ask her dad, and lately he gives her quick pecks on the cheek or forehead when she gets a problem right on the first try. If they weren’t having sex, Riza would be convinced that he sees her as a little sister and himself an older brother.

Having sex twice in one night is also a nice new experience.

* * *

Berthold Hawkeye is home from his trip to West City for five days when Riza comes home from school to the sounds of him and Roy _screaming_ at each other.

_What’s going on?_

For a moment, Riza is petrified. Did her Father find out that she and Roy have been having sex? He’s doesn’t talk to her much, but he’s always been very adamant about his daughter having sex.

She is to keep her legs tightly shut until she’s legally wed, just as all girls her age should do.

It’s only after she hears her Father scream that Roy wants to be a _useless dog_ and that he _wasted over two years teaching him_ that Riza realizes that he didn’t find out about them having premarital sex, but that Roy wants to enlist in the military.

Did she not tell Roy to keep his mouth shut about that?

“Riza! Is that you? Get up here- now!” Her Father screams for her.

“Coming!” Riza yelled, dropping her bag and racing up the stairs. She stands in the doorway to her Father’s study, trying not to whimper in fear at the tension in the air due to the hostility between Roy and Berthold.

“Go help Mr. Mustang pack his things. He is to be _out_ of _my_ house by dinner time.” Berthold snarled.

“Yes sir.” Riza nodded, stepping out in to the hallway so she could follow Roy to his room. She closes the his bedroom door behind her and glares at him.

“You idiot!” She whispers angrily. “Why did you tell him!?”

“I didn’t! He checked the mail and found my recruitment papers.” Roy sighed, pulling his suitcase out from under his bed and tossing it on to his pillow.

“You complete and utter dumb ass! You should’ve waited until after you left this miserable hellhole to start your enlistment!” Riza snapped.

Roy turned and glared at her, his pupils dilating. He’s angry at her Father as he quietly shoves her on to the edge of his bed, pressing their lips together as he pulls down their pants and slams into her.

It _hurts_ , more so then it did when they lost their virginity by the pond, but they both know if she didn’t want _this_ to be happening, she would have raised absolute hell in order to get him _off_ and _out_ of her. And the only thing Riza does is wrap her legs around his hips and try not to look too disappointed when he spills his seed inside of her long before she has the chance to start enjoying herself.

Roy doesn’t say a word as he pulls out of her and hikes his pants back up around his hips. He doesn’t even look at her or hand her a dirty shirt of his to help her clean off her inner thighs. He just goes back to grumbling about how _her Father has his head shoved so far up his ass he can taste his own stomach acid_ while he finishes packing up his things.

Riza says nothing as she pulls her panties and shorts back up (she’ll clean herself up in her bedroom or the bathroom _later_ ) and quietly heads back to her room, trying not to cry because, once again, her Father has to ruin something that’s good in her life because of his “ _it’s either my way or no way_ ” fucking mentality.

And when Roy leaves in the late hours of the evening, he doesn’t say goodbye to her, and she doesn’t say goodbye to him. Riza doesn’t hold her breath on ever getting to see or hear from Roy Mustang again.

He isn’t the first person to leave her behind. He will not be the last.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning
> 
> This chapter is where the “Graphic Depictions of Violence” kicks in. It’s an important part of the story, but if you don’t want to read it, stop reading the chapter when you get to this part, because the rest of the chapter is just downhill from there:
> 
> “Riza freezes up when she sees Berthold standing there in the doorway to the kitchen, and she instantly knows that he knows.“

Riza isn’t concerned when her cycle doesn’t show up.

She isn’t consistent on when she bleeds or doesn’t. She’s only been considered a woman for a year and a half now, and she once four months without getting a period. So when she skips two months after Roy leaves, Riza doesn’t worry. Blames it on her body or the stress of her life. Doesn’t even think twice about it.

It’s only when she gets sick behind a tree on the way home from school that she starts to think that maybe, _just maybe_ , there’s another reason for her late period. After puking on the way home from school every day for a week that she figures out what’s wrong with her.

Her and Roy have created a _life_. Together. Alchemist can’t do that. They’ve all tried and tried, but none have ever succeeded.

Riza isn’t scared. She should be. She should be an utter mess of tears and hysterics. But she isn’t. She sees it as a chance to turn over a new leaf. She doesn’t get into fights with the boys at school anymore. No more outburst in class. Riza does nothing that could put the tiny cluster of cells nestled deep inside her belly in danger.

Every night, she lays in her bed, pulls her nightgown up to her chest, and strokes her belly. She’s in love with her child, and loving something- _someone_ \- is a foreign feeling for Riza. She doesn’t love her parents, and she didn’t love Roy.

_But she loves her baby._

Riza doesn’t even care that it’s Roy’s baby, too. It’s not like she has a way to tell him that he’s going to be a Father. He has been gone for nearly three months, and so far she has not gotten one phone call, letter, post card, or even a telegram. Riza doesn’t need Roy. Her baby doesn’t need him, either.

She’ll _never_ leave the baby in her belly behind for greener pastures, not like Pauline did to her.

* * *

Her belly starts to swell up, just a tiny little bit, when the leaves change color and the wind starts to get chillier. No one knows that she’s pregnant. It’s her own amazing secret.

Riza wonders what to name her baby. She knows her baby needs more important things; clothes, nappies, a cradle. A name is the least important thing that they need. But she can’t help but to go to the library after school and skim through books for name ideas.

Her list of names she _hates_ is triple the length of the list of names that she _likes_.

Her requirements are simple. Nothing with an _R, E, B, M, H,_ or _P_. It can’t be a name that belongs to someone she hates. It can’t be too difficult for her child to spell or pronounce. And it has to be a name that has a nickname that _makes sense_.

She wonders if the fact that she likes more boy names then girl names means that she’s going to end up having a _daughter_.

* * *

Riza comes home from school on the last day before winter break and sees her Father, waiting for her to come home.

He’s glaring at her, his cold blue eyes locked on to her belly.

Riza freezes up when she sees Berthold standing there in the doorway to the kitchen, and she instantly knows that he knows. She doesn’t know how he knows, but he’s figured it out. He lunges at her, and she runs to get to safety. But like an _idiot_ , she runs up the stairs instead of out the front door.

It’s a _mistake_ that costs her baby their _life_.

Berthold catches her by the back of her sweater, right before she can get to her bedroom, and throws her down on to the floor. Riza cries out in pain when his steel toed boot first collides with her belly. He keeps on kicking, and her small hands aren’t enough to shield her unborn child from the assault.

He kicks and kicks and kicks, and he doesn’t stop kicking her until her light wash jeans start to turn red with blood.

“Clean up the fucking mess. Useless bitch.” He snarls at her.

Riza practically crawls to the bathroom, shutting and locking the door behind her. She turns on the water to the bath, takes off her blood stained pants and worn out sweater, and sinks into the cold water. She grabs two wash cloths, one to clean off her thighs, the other to put into her mouth to muffle her sobs.

Her Father murdered her baby. Killed her and Roy’s baby.

“I would ask who the Father was, but you probably don’t even know who he is! You stupid fucking whore!” She hears Berthold scream, stomping up and down the hallway.

Riza considers lying to her Father. Debates on whether or not to tell him that someone attacked her, forced her face down into the dirt and raped her without saying a word.

But she doesn’t. He wouldn’t believe her anyway.

“I don’t know why I’m surprised. You can’t behave like a proper young lady. Why would I believe for one second that you were capable of keeping your legs shut!?”

The bath water is red and murky at this point, and her stomach is throbbing. It’s like every cramp from every period she’s ever gotten rolled up into one times ten.

If the neighbors heard her screams, they don’t call Sheriff Rodney.

* * *

It takes three days for the bleeding to stop, and nearly a week for the cramps to subside.

Riza isn’t allowed to leave the house after that.

_“I hear either of those doors open, you’ll be in a lot more pain.” Berthold growled at her._

When she gets ready to go back to school after winter break ends, he stops her.

“Where do you think you’re going?” He snarled.

“S-school.” She stammers.

Berthold lets out a scoff. “So you can open your legs and get knocked up _again_? I don’t think so. You’ll study _here_ , where I can keep an eye on you.” He says, tossing an advanced algebra book onto her bed.

“ _Whores don’t get a proper education_.” He yells over his shoulder as he walks back to his study.

When Miss Austin comes by three days later to check on Riza, Berthold tells her that he wants to give Riza a more advanced education at home.

Miss Austin, a frail woman of fifty, sees the dead look in Riza’s eyes as she stands behind a towering Berthold. And it kills her to know that there’s _nothing_ she can do for her now former star student.

* * *

On the first day of May, Riza wakes up to her back throbbing in a dull pain. Gasping, she walks on shaky legs to the bathroom, takes off her nightgown and glances over her shoulder to look at what’s wrong.

The site she sees has her throat closing up.

The skin of her back is covered in odd looking markings. Two giant snakes, words that don’t look like they’re in Amestrian, and a funny looking circle.

_What...?_

“It’s my research.” The sounds of her Father’s voice has Riza jumping in terror. Riza turns and looks at him, fear in her whiskey brown eyes.

“You’ll be the guardian to my work, to the secrets of Flame Alchemy. I put it in a _safe place_ , considering how much time you spend on your _back_.” He sneers. Without saying another word to her, Berthold leaves to go back to his room, and Riza goes back to her own room to go through her clothes.

In the end, all Riza has to wear for tops are a small handful of turtlenecks.

* * *

On the one year anniversary of the day he killed his unborn grandchild in cold blood, Berthold Hawkeye becomes bedridden.

It’s a vicious form of irony that Riza finds that she loves.

On his bad days, she considers taking one of his spare pillows and smothering him while he’s sleeping. On his good days, she considers taking the largest knife that they have in their kitchen and plunging it into his chest and stomach until he’s nothing but a bloody mess.

One stab for every kick he slammed into his pregnant daughter’s slowly swelling belly.

But Riza doesn’t kill him. She is smart enough to know she would not survive going to prison for murder.

Waiting for Berthold to die is a waiting game she’s forced to play.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warnings for this chapter:  
> •Death of a minor character  
> •Sex between a sixteen year old girl and twenty year old man  
> •Mentions of child abuse and fetal death

Riza feels her heart stop when she hears a knock at the front door, opens it up and sees _Roy_ standing on the porch, dressed in a military uniform.

He’s surprised to see her. He obviously figured she would be at school, and he most definitely didn’t expect to see her in a sweater and a knee length skirt.

“H-Hey. Is your Father home?” He asks, and she tries not to show sadness at the fact that he wants to see her Father and not _her_.

“Upstairs. In his room.” Riza answers, moving out of his way as he walks through the front door and up the steps.

_Off to see the man that murdered our unborn child._

Riza sits on the couch and waits for Roy to come stomping down the steps and out the front door. She knows why he’s here. He wants to learn Flame Alchemy. It’s why he showed up to study Alchemy under her Father in the first place. But Riza knows that Berthold won’t teach it to him, even if he was in good health.

Roy shamed Berthold by joining the military.

But instead of hearing Roy storming out of the house, she hears him yelling for her. In confusion, she stands up and walks up the steps, and is utterly shocked to see her Father, face down on his bed, blood slipping out of his mouth like drool.

Berthold Hawkeye is _dead_ , and Riza Hawkeye is _free_.

* * *

Roy pays for the funeral, and Riza lets him, not wanting to explain why she doesn’t want him to. They make awkward small talk at his grave site, and Riza decides to show him her Father’s research.

It was inevitable that she would get naked for Roy Mustang again, anyway.

He’s understandably _shocked_.

“When did he do this to you?” He gasps. It wasn’t there the last time he saw her naked back.

“I’m not really sure. Woke up one day and it was there.” Riza mumbles, shoulders tensing when he puts his coat over her shoulders.

“I’m so sorry.” He mumbles.

“Don’t be. I think this was always his plan for me, being the guardian of his research.” Riza says softly, and it’s the truth.

The tattoo on her back has been inevitable since the day Pauline Hawkeye left her three year old daughter behind to fend for herself.

“You can learn the secrets of Flame Alchemy, if you want to. Wouldn’t have shown this to you if I didn’t want you to.” She tells him.

“O-okay.” He mumbles, swallowing as she slips his jacket off and on to the floor.

* * *

He’s there for a week when he finally asks her what the hell happened.

“What happened to you? You used to be an ass kicker. Now you’re just... existing.” He points out, his voice full of worry as he paces around the kitchen.

Riza looks down at her knees. _You need to tell him. He deserves to know about the child that should’ve been_. Her conscious tells her. Riza lets out a shaky breath, before looking up at him.

“Do you remember all the times that we had sex?” She asks him.

“Yeah.” Roy nods, and Riza can see his ears turning red.

“It got me _pregnant_.” She gasps, fighting back tears as his jaw drops. She sees him tense up, and he’s quiet as he waits for her to tell him what happened to the baby they made together.

“Anyway, my dad found out- I’m not sure how, I didn’t tell _anyone_ about it. And he... beat it out of me. Called me a _whore_. Never asked who the dad was, he assumed that I didn’t even know who it was. After that he wouldn’t let me leave the house. Told my teacher he was going to home school me so I could get a more “ _advanced_ ” education. He told me that _whores don’t a proper education_. Couple months after that, _this_ happened.” She said, pointing to her back.

“And do you want to know the worst part?” She asks, finally looking him in the eyes.

“What?” He asks softly.

“ _I wanted that baby, Roy_. Not because it was yours, but because they would’ve been the first person in my entire life that didn’t look at me and automatically think of me as some feral child, or a burden, or like they were scared of me. They would’ve looked at me and saw _nothing_ but _good_ in me. And my dad took that away from me, and he did it so easily, too.” Riza told him, tears falling down her cheeks.

All Roy can do is grab her and pull her into his lap, holding her as she sobs into his shirt, his cheek resting on the top of her head.

“We can make another baby.” He tells her softly.

He’ll give her a new baby, if she wants him to. It’s the least he can do to repay her, since she’s giving him the secrets to Flame Alchemy. He’ll be nothing more then a check in the mail if that’s all she wants him to be, too. He feels her tense up, and she pulls away to look him in the eyes. She’s searching for signs that he was only kidding.

And yet, she finds _none_.

“Okay.” Riza mumbles, a small smile on her face as Roy wipes her tears away with his thumb. He stands up, scoops her into his arms, and carries her upstairs to her room.

* * *

They spend the rest of the day naked in bed. Roy kisses every inch of her, whispering sweet words into her skin as he spills load after load of his seed into her. Between rounds, when they have to wait for him to recover, he studies her back.

“What did he say when you found this on your skin?” Roy asked.

“Said I was the guardian of his work. Told me he put it in a safe place since I spent so much time on my back.” Riza scoffed.

“Heartless bastard.” Roy growled, kissing the sun on her lower back.

Riza rolls over on to her side, pushing him on to his back so she can straddle him. She grasps the base of his cock in her hand as she sinks down on to him, sighing in pleasure once he’s fully sheathed.

“Damn, that feels _good_.” She groaned, rotating her hips as one of his hands grips her left breast and the other rubs her clit in rough circles.

“Hey Riza?”

“Hmm?” She hums, not stopping her movements.

“Marry me.” Roy begs her. He’ll still give her a baby, even if she won’t marry him.

This has her stopping. She leans back slightly to look him in the eyes, searching for any sign that Roy was joking. Riza never thought anyone would ever ask her to marry them. She grew up being the girl that the boys would rather have all of their teeth pulled then spend the rest of their lives with her. But all she sees in his narrow black eyes are _love_ and _adoration_.

“Yes.” She nods, a smile on her face, the first smile on her face in nearly two years. “Yes, I’ll marry you.”

Roy rolls her over, a large smile on his face as he kisses her fully on the lips and pounds into her.

* * *

“I’m sorry.” Roy said softly, his fingers in her hair as she lays her head on his chest.

“What for?”

“How I acted when I left. I never should have left you behind.” He answers.

It’s all his fault. It’s his fault their first baby was taken from them in one of the worst ways imaginable. It’s his fault her back now plays a dual role as a notebook. It’s his fault that she didn’t get to finish her education properly.

None of those things would’ve happened had he just thrown her over his shoulder and taken her to Central to stay with his Aunt while he was at the Academy.

“Please don’t blame yourself, Roy. You couldn’t have known what was going to happen. Neither of us could. The only person to blame is my dad. And thankfully, he’s _dead_ now.” Riza tells him, leaning her head up to kiss him on the throat.

“I still feel guilty, Riza.” He sighed.

“Hey. Look at me. I am telling you, as the person who dealt with all the horrible things that you’re feeling guilty over during these past two years, that it is not your fault. And who’s to say that if you had taken me with you, that my Father wouldn’t have tracked me down and dragged me back home?” Riza sits up, looking him in the eyes.

“He would have hunted me down, ripped our baby out of my arms, and either taken them with him and left me behind or taken me and left our child behind. These last two years would’ve been awful for me in some way or another regardless.”

Roy exhales slowly, knowing that she’s right. He sits up and quickly gets out of bed. Reaching down to pull on his boxers.

“Roy?” _Where is he going? Did I do something wrong?_

“Come on. Let’s pack up your things and get out of this hell house. I’ve got an apartment in East City. It isn’t much, can barely even be considered an apartment, if I’m being truthful. But at least it isn’t the location of every bad childhood memory that you have.” He tells her.

“That sounds like a wonderful idea.” Riza grins.

* * *

A taxi takes them the hour drive from her hometown to the nearest train station.

Riza didn’t bring much- didn’t own much to bring. Everything she wanted to keep was able to be stuffed into one large suitcase, which now resided in the trunk of the cab. They don’t say much during the car ride, the couple content with holding hands while they stare out the window at the scenery.

She has no problem leaving her childhood home and town behind. Let the bank take the house. Let the townspeople think her Father slaughtered her and buried her underneath the back porch before his own death. It's not like any of them showed up at his funeral and saw her.

She couldn’t give a flying shit even if you paid her too.

It blows Riza’s mind that she’s leaving her old life behind. She knows her life is going to be different now. She’s engaged to a solider, and a ( _hopefully_ ) soon to be State Alchemist. She’ll be expected to accompany him to any military galas or formal events he’s forced to attend, be respectful to the _second_ and _third_ wives of the men who outrank him, while praying she is Roy’s _first_ and _only_ bride and is never traded in for a younger model.

How she behaves will be a reflection on him.

It’s a truth that oddly doesn’t scare Riza. In all honesty, she looks forward to it.

She looks forward to greeting him when he comes home from work, to raising their children (or child, she doesn’t care how many they have, as long as there is at least _one_ tiny human in the world that calls them _mom_ and _dad_ ) and loving them as much as her parents didn’t love her.

“You okay?” Roy’s question breaks her from her thoughts.

“Yes. Why?” Riza asks.

“Just curious. You seem lost in thought.” Roy pointed out.

“I was. My life is going to be completely different now compared to my childhood. You would think I would be terrified over all of the changes- but I’m not.” She admits.

“I’m glad you’re not scared. And it’s new to me too.” He said, taking her hand and kissing her palm.

“But I love you, and I want you to know that I will _never_ put you through what _either_ of your parents did.”

Riza smiles at him. They’re _engaged_ , and it’s the time either of them have ever said the words _I love you_.

“I love you, too.”

* * *

Roy decides to call his family at the station while they wait for their train‘s boarding time to be called.

“Hey Nessa. Can you put Chris in the phone?.... No, I don’t care if she’s busy. It’s important. _Now_!... Ohh, don’t nag me, Vanessa. Will-will you just _please_ put- put her on the phone!” Roy begged, groaning into the receiver, his brows scrunching up in frustration in a way that has Riza giggling.

“Thank you! Hi Aunt Chris. Guess what?.... I’m getting married!..... Yes, I’m serious.... No, it’s not because she’s pregnant.” He sighs, smirking when he sees Riza mouth the word _yet_ to him.

“...... Hold up a second, Chris. Do you want to have a wedding?” Roy turns to ask her.

Riza’s face scrunches up in disgust. The idea of wearing a long white gown for a ceremony that no one in her family will attend has her grimacing. “I would rather have a root canal.” She tells him.

“Tell Vanessa and the rest of the girls _no wedding_. The bride says _no_..... I don’t care if the girls want to throw us a wedding. Riza said _no_!..... Yes, it’s the same Riza whose dad taught me Alchemy.... She’s not a basket case!” He yelled.

“That’s the nicest way anyone’s ever described me!” Riza laughs.

Roy lets out a groan. “Fiiiiiine. I will let her know. The girls want to throw you a bachelorette party. No idea what they have in store, but you have my sympathy regardless. No alcohol though! She isn’t twenty one yet.”

“Didn’t stop me before.” She mutters under her breath, thinking about the time she raided her Father’s liquor cabinet when she was eleven.

Roy takes his free hand and presses it to her belly, reminding her that they want a baby. Alcohol and an unborn child aren’t a healthy combination.

“Gotta go. Trains leaving. Love y’all. Bye!”

* * *

Riza walks back to her seat next to Roy from the train cars bathroom and tries not to start crying.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” He asked softly, holding her hand as she sits down.

“I got my period.” She mumbles.

“I’m sorry.” He’s sad but honestly not surprised. It’s only been a week since they started trying to get riza purposefully pregnant.

“R-Roy? What it what my dad did caused more damage then I thought?” She asks timidly.

That’s been her biggest fear over the last two years. That her _first_ pregnancy would be her _only_ pregnancy.

“Hey, look at me. These things take time. According to my aunt, it took my parents five _years_ to make me. And last time, we had sex how often?”

“Every day for a month.”

“Exactly. It will happen when it’s meant to happen. And if it doesn’t happen the way we want it to, then we’ll adjust. There are other ways to becoming parents besides getting pregnant.” He reassures her.

“I know. I just- want this to happen so badly. I’ve never wanted anything more in my entire life. And my father took nearly everything from me. I don’t want him to take away _this_ as well.”

“I know.”

* * *

Roy wasn’t exaggerating when he said his apartment wasn’t much. If anything, he was under selling it.

There was a couch, a coffee table, and a tv.

That was it.

“This is all you have?” She asks, mouth hung open.

“Yep. Told you it wasn’t much.” He said, rubbing the back of his neck.

“You were _not_ kidding. Do you even have a bedroom?”

“Mhm. Nothing is in it though.”

_Of course._

“Well, I would say let’s christen your apartment, but I started my cycle and don’t feel like purposefully risking getting blood on your couch.” Riza tells him, even though his couch _is_ black.

Roy snorts out a laugh. “There’s a furniture store in town. We can get a bed there.”

 _That we can christen later_ , he smirks.

“Can you afford a bed, after paying for my dad’s funeral?” Riza asked.

“Mhm. I can’t afford the nicest bed in Amestris, but I can afford something big enough for the both of us to sleep on comfortably. And it can always be replaced once I, hopefully, pass the State Alchemist exam and get promoted to a Major.” Roy answered.

_Money will be tight until I get my next paycheck, but thankfully all the bills are due afterwards._

“Okay. Do you care if you go and get it by yourself, so I can unpack?” Riza asked.

“Sure. Be back in an hour or two.” He said, kissing her on the lips.

“Love you.” He yelled over his shoulder.

“Love you too.”

When Roy came home, there were men carrying a simple brown wooden bead frame that needed to be put together, and another two men carrying a full sized mattress. The bed wasn’t much to look at, a solid brown headboard and no foot board.

When they left, Riza noticed her fiancé was holding a large brown paper bag and a small brown paper bag, with a second large bag on the floor.

“What are in the bags?” She asked, an eye brow raised.

“Pillows and sheets.” He said, motioning to the large bag in his hand, “A comforter.” He tapped the bag on the floor with his foot, “And a box of pregnancy tests.” He held up the small bag.

“Why? I’m not pregnant. And what the hell is a pregnancy test?”

“It’s something that tells you that you’re pregnant. I got them so you wouldn’t have to worry about not having them in the future. And how did you find out you were pregnant last time?” Roy asked, baffled by her confusion over what a pregnancy test was.

Riza shrugged “I started throwing up.”

* * *

They were married in the courthouse eight days later.

Roy’s foster sisters are upset that they didn’t get to throw Riza a bachelorette party beforehand, but the newly weds don’t care. The girls can throw her one later. They have more important matters to attend to.

“ _Oh fuck yes_!”

Like consummating their marriage.

And that is how Riza found herself, an hour after saying “ _I do_ ”, with her ass in the air and shoulders down against the comforter gripped between her fingers as her husband held on tightly to her hips and slammed into her from behind.

“ _Oh s-shit_.” He grunted, his hips stilling as he came.

The lovebirds collapsed over on to their sides, Roy’s softening dick still buried inside of her. He strokes her bangs out of her face as he kisses her along her shoulders and neck.

“How do you feel, my lovely wife?” He smiles, his arm slung over her stomach.

“Very satisfied, my wonderful husband.” She answered, turning her head to kiss him on the lips.

* * *

Riza gets her period every month for the next three months, despite her and Roy having unprotected sex every single day that she isn’t bleeding.

She tries not to let it get her down.

Roy passed his State Alchemist exam (he’s now known as the _Flame Alchemist_ , according to Führer Bradley) and is now the rank of a Major, so at least something positive has happened during their marriage.

Riza doesn’t let Roy see the fact that she cries every every time she starts her cycle.

Roy doesn’t let Riza know that he knows that’s what she does. It’s why he makes sure to tell her that he loves her every time he leaves for work and every time he comes back home.

* * *

They’re married for six months when Riza wakes up one morning feeling... _weird_. She doesn’t know how to describe the feeling, nor does she tell Roy while he is getting ready for work. He has enough to deal with on his plate, there’s talk of the State Alchemists getting sent to the front lines in Ishval in the next few months.

She doesn’t want him to worry about her, too.

After he leaves for work, she goes to the bathroom to brush her teeth, and takes notice in the box of pregnancy tests in the medicine cabinet. It’s not a big box, only three in the test. _Could I be...?_ She pondered, grabbing the box and reading the instructions.

_Remove test from packaging. Take cap off of test. Submerge tip in urine for five seconds. Place cap back on to test. Lie test on flat surface. Wait three minutes. One line: negative. Two lines: positive. For most accurate results, use morning urine._

Putting the box down, she walks to the kitchen, grabs one of the glasses from the kitchen cabinet, and walks back to the bathroom to pee in the cup (let’s _not_ tell Roy about _that_ ).

She does what the instructions say, going back to the kitchen to drink a cup of tea while she waits. After her tea is drank and cup is in the sink, she goes back to the bathroom to check the pregnancy test. Her jaw drops at what she sees.

Two lines. The test has two, solid blue lines. It’s positive. She’s _pregnant_. She’s pregnant again. Her and Roy were finally- _finally_!- successful in getting pregnant again.

Her Father’s assault on her didn’t make her barren.

In a rush of shock and adrenaline, she grabs a second test, opens it, and dips it into the cup of pee, staring at the first test while she waits.

The second test is the same as the first one: positive.

* * *

Riza spends the entire day excited to tell Roy that he’s going to be a Father. Until he comes home from work in an absolutely foul mood, and she’s worried that now isn’t the time to announce the news.

“I-is everything okay?”

“Yeah. Just General Hakuro being an absolute jackass. Anything that went wrong I was blamed for- whether I had something to do with it or not. Just- _ugggghh_!” Roy groaned, collapsing on to the couch and pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Please for the love of God tell me that your day was better then mine.” He begged her.

“I’m _pregnant_.”

Roy looks up at his wife, eyes wide as he sees a smile on her face. “Really?” He gasps, and grins widely when he sees her nod enthusiastically. He gets up off the couch and drops to his knees in front of her, his hands resting on her waist.

“Hi there little one. It’s your daddy. You don’t know how much me and your mommy _love you_.” Roy cooed, lifting up her shirt kissing just below her belly button.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not sure if it’s a trigger warning, but there’s childbirth in this chapter.
> 
> Yay Royai!Baby, whoo hoo! 
> 
> Will I ever have a story centered around Riza and Roy not having a child? Probably not.

Every day Roy leaves for work, Riza wonders if he’s going to come home with deployment orders. It makes her worried, that he won’t be able to see the birth of their child, that he’ll die in the desert before he even has the chance to lay eyes on their baby and hold them in his arms.

Or worst; that he’ll die before Riza has a chance to deliver the baby.

So they live every day like it’s the last day they have with each other. When he isn’t at work they snuggle in bed or on the couch, with Roy telling their slowly growing child how much he loves them.

They debate names, mentioning to each other the names they like and the ones they don’t. But a name for their child isn’t set in stone at the end of their discussions.

Roy’s suggestion of naming their baby, if it’s a girl, _Elizabeth_ after her is met with a flick to the forehead and a stern _no_.

* * *

“Your stomach is getting bigger every time I come home.” Roy tells her as he walks through the front door.

“I know right?” Riza grins, rubbing her belly before she continues with washing the dishes. She’s six months pregnant, and every day the baby in her womb grows bigger and stronger.

“Guess what tomorrow is?” He asks, a smile on his face.

“Umm, Saturday?”

“Our first wedding anniversary!”

Riza looked at him with wide eyes and a hung open mouth. How could she forget their anniversary? What the hell was wrong with her?

“I completely forgot. I’m so sorry.” She mumbled, putting the sponge down into the soapy water.

“Hey, it’s okay. You’ve been preoccupied with more important things.” Roy smiled at her, walking over to her and placing his hands on her belly, kissing her on the lips.

“How were they today?”

“They’ve been doing back flips and somersaults all day.”

“Any guesses on what they’re going to be?”

“No. Some days I think it’s a boy, other days a girl.” Riza shrugs, wrapping her arms around his neck.

“I love you.”

“I love you, more.”

* * *

They spend their first anniversary sitting on their couch, eating a horde of Xingese take out while a radio plays music in the background.

“Have you heard any thing about you getting shipped off to Ishval?” Riza asked him.

“No. Nothing. And I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. I mean, I know it’s going to happen. I’ve accepted that. I just want to be here when you deliver. I’m scared that you’re still going to be pregnant when I’m shipped out.”

“I’m terrified you’ll be killed while I’m still pregnant.” Riza tells him.

“That scares me, too.” Roy admits, wrapping his arms around her, their chins resting on the others shoulder.

“Roy? What’s... what’s going to happen to our baby if we _both_ die?” Riza asks, swallowing harshly.

“They’ll go to Central, and be raised by my Aunt Chris like I was.” Roy tells her. “I mentioned it to her a few months ago, she said she’s okay with that happening.”

* * *

Roy uses Alchemy to make their baby a cradle, using their old coffee table to do so.

It’s a simple gesture that Riza adores.

“How did we get so lucky?” Riza asks, a hand on her stomach, containing the baby due in just a months time.

It shocks her sometimes, how much she’s changed in the last three years.

Three years ago she was in old shorts and a dirty t-shirt, getting into fist fights with boys twice her size. During the next three years of her life she lost her virginity, got pregnant, lost the baby in a horrendous way, became a human notebook, got married to the man she lost her virginity with, and in just five weeks is going to be having a new baby with him.

Roy just smiles at her, standing up to kiss her cheek before crouching down to kiss her belly. It saddens him that her awful childhood has lowered her expectations for receiving kindness, but he says nothing about it to her.

“We really need to pick out a name for if it’s a girl.” He tells her instead.

“Ungh. Please don’t remind me.” Riza groaned, laying down on the couch.

* * *

Two weeks before Riza’s due date, a loud clap of thunder shakes the apartment, followed by the sound of raining pouring from the sky in the middle of the night.

“Jesus Christ.” Roy grumbled, getting out of bed to look out the window.

“Does it look as bad as it sounds?” Riza asks, her back to him.

Roy watches as a stop sign gets blown down the street and blanches. “Yeah. It’s bad. Glad I don’t work today.” He snorts.

“Come back to bed then.” She yawns. Before Roy can reply or do as she asks, she lets out a gasp and quickly sit up.

“What? What is it? What’s wrong?” Roy yelps, rushing over to her.

“My w-water just broke.”

 _Oh crap. Oh shit. Oh crap. Oh shit._ His mind is racing a thousand miles a second. He can’t drive her to the hospital in this weather. And the chances of the doctor getting to their apartment in time are about as high as his chances of not going to Ishval.

“So we’re gonna have to have the baby here.” Roy declares.

“What?” Riza gasps.

“I’m not driving you in this weather! I highly doubt the doctor will get here in time. So we’ll just do it here.” He tells her.

“You have lost your mind. I love you, but you’re insane.”

“Do you have any other suggestions?” Roy asked.

“... No...” Riza sighed, letting out a sharp cry when a contraction hit her.

“D-Do, ow god, you know what to do?” She asks.

“Kind of.”

“Kind of!?”

“Hey, don’t yell. A few of my aunts girls have had babies over the years. And while I wasn’t there helping, I do remember what all is needed.”

“Which is what?”

“Clean towels, hot water, scissors, disinfectant wipes, and something to tie off the umbilical cord.” Roy says, listing off the items.

“Okay. If- if you think you can do this, alright.” She groans.

* * *

“God! When is this _thing_ going to come out?” Riza moaned in pain, pacing around their bedroom.

“It’s a waiting game, Riza. With Juniper it took over a day, with Nelly a few hours. It’s a different time length every time.” Roy tells her.

“Oh that blows ass.” She scoffs.

“I’m telling you this now, Roy. If this baby isn’t out by the time the storm lets up, you _are_ taking me to the hospital.” Riza snarled at him.

“Oh of course!”

“There is one positive to this hell on Earth I’m going through.” Riza admits, sitting down on the bed.

“Hmm?”

“Our baby is going to be so worth it.”

They both can’t help but smile over this fact. Sometime in the next twenty four hours, they are going to have a wonderful little baby in their arms. A perfect combination of the two of them, and the physical embodiment of the love they have for each other.

“I love you. I love you both so damn much.” Roy tells her, crouched on his knees in front of her and kissing her lips.

“You better for doing this to me.” Riza jokes, a grin on her face before she tenses up.

“Ooh, that was a weird feeling.” She grunts.

“What?”

“It kind of felt like the baby dropped. Sort of like how you accidentally drop something fragile, but you catch it in time before it shatters on the ground. It gave me that same kind of rush. I don’t... I don’t know how else to describe it.”

“I think that means our baby is moving to the birth canal.”

“That better mean this hellfire is almost over!”

* * *

It’s another hour before Riza feels the need to push.

She’s sitting on the edge of the bed, with Roy crouched between her open legs on the floor, a towel draped over his leg and a pair of scissors next to Riza on the bed.

“Remember what I said to do?” Roy asks her.

“Push on the contractions, take a break when they subside.” She gasps, tears falling down her cheeks.

“Riza, baby, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?”

“I’m scared Roy. What if I can’t do this?” She sobbed. _Kinda too late to be thinking that now, don’t you think?_

“Yes you can. You’ve been through so much worst than this- we _both_ know you have- and you survived.” Roy reassured her, squeezing her hand tightly.

Roy was right.

She survived Berthold’s multiple kicks to her abdomen during her first pregnancy, an event that could’ve caused her to bleed to death or die from an infection. She survived him some how rendering her unconscious and tattooing his flame Alchemy notes on to her back, an event that could’ve also become infected and killed her.

And yet, here she was. _Alive_ and about to become a _mother_.

On Riza’s next contraction she pushes, letting out a cry of pain as she wonders in the back of her mind how the hell she thought she could do this at _fourteen_ verses doing it now at _seventeen_. When the pain is over she pants, trying to catch her breath and calm her heart rate. It takes her nearly an hour of pushing before she feels the sensation of their baby slipping out of her and into Roy’s arms, a sharp cry piercing the air.

_Our baby is okay._

“ _‘e’s here_!” She hears Roy tell her happily.

“What?” She gasps, not entirely hearing what he had said.

“It’s a _boy_!” He laughs, wrapping their baby- their _son_ \- up in the towel and into Riza’s arms. Riza can’t help the happy sob that escapes her as she looks down at her precious little boy. She can’t believe how much he resembles Roy. Same dark black hair, cute little nose, and chubby cheeks.

“Hi honey. Hi my sweet baby boy.” She coos, stroking his hair while he screams his head off, oxygen filling his lungs.

“It’s a good thing he’s a boy, because we never did agree on a name for a girl.” Roy jokes, taking a spare towel to clean the blood and amniotic fluids from Riza’s inner thighs.

“I honestly figured that meant he _was_ going to be a girl. An odd form of karma.” Riza admits.

Once the umbilical cord has been clamped and cut, Roy helps Riza move to lean against their headboard, their son never leaving her arms. He lays down next to her while she unbuttons her nightgown, offering her breast to their son.

They can’t help but watch in awe as Kieran nurses, smiling at the tiny grunts and sighs he makes while he eats.

“He looks just like you.” Riza tells him, holding a tiny fist in her hand.

“I’ve find that all newborns look the same the first few days. Besides, I see some of you in him, too.” Roy points out.

“Really? What?”

“He has your chin and ears.” He tells her. “What are you thinking about?” Roy questions, noticing the look on her face.

“I’ve always wondered how my mom could carry me inside of her for nine months, look at me at my most fragile and helpless state... and _still abandon me_. And looking at him, this tiny and wonderfully innocent human being, it makes even less sense to me.” Riza sighed.

“I don’t know. How both of your parents treated you will never make any sense to me. But look on the bright side.”

“What’s that?”

“He’ll _never_ go through what you did.” Roy reminds her, kissing her on the lips. “I love you.”

“I love you, more.”

“Besides, considering how your dad treated you, it wouldn’t surprise me if he killed your mom, buried her somewhere out in the woods and then lied and said she left you guys.” Roy admitted, shrugging his shoulders.

His suggestion got Riza thinking of her mother in a possibly different light.

Did Pauline Hawkeye leave behind a husband and daughter?

Or did said husband kill her and get away with it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dun! Dun! Dun!
> 
> Random little fact: I actually had it planned from the get go that the baby was going to be a girl. Had a name picked out for her and everything.
> 
> But then I realized that nearly all of my Royai stories where they become parents have them having a girl first, and changed my mind and made their baby a little boy.


End file.
